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poolpartypirates:

a boner is basically your dick blushing

You make my dick blush ;*

(via reaillest-rick)

I fucking hate it when irrelevant-ass, boring, stupid bitches be all up on my dick like its the thing to do. Don’t “GONZZZAAAALLLLOOOOOOO!” me when I see you. I hate you. Don’t call me your best friend because I care more about the pizza slice I’m having for lunch than you. Stop. 

(via tsundere-senpai)